for consecutive 6 days.
nobody knows how much i want to say, how much i want to descibe, how much i really want to evaporate into the air right now. god damn serious.
i tried to describe as much as i could. but somehow, THERE'S STILL ALOT, ALOT LEFT IN THAT TROUBLED MIND.
forget it lah. nothing flows well for me. school, club, relationship, mentally and physically.
really wanna just fuck all of these, and really hope i can turn time back to when i was, when i was a baby.
well-tempered, patient, organised, not stubborn. a 'perfect' person.
probably, i wont quarrel soooooooooooooo, extremely much with my boyfriend.
i just dont know what's with me lah!
i really feel apologetic. but i find it real hard to apologise just like that!
the word "s-o-r-r-y" is damn tough to say when you really realised your mistakes.
it is already at the tip of your tongue, but somehow got stucked before your lips.
after listening to what that jackass said, i found that I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH FAULTSSSSS. you also have okay!? just that i dont wanto say out only! i know where went wrong but i just hope you'll realise your own mistakes. unfortunately, your brains only got fyp,fyp,and more fyp.
i think i've fallen to the edge of your strand of hair, behind the skull :/ and maybe, one day, as the wind blowssss...... Phew! gone.
damn sad eh like that! i dont want lah, cb.
"can you please fucking shut up and listen?! you talk non-stop!"
"can you please not be stubborn for fucking once?"
"oh lord fucking god, jesus christ. why are you 'complaining' non-stop?!"
"cha gi ya, can you stop complaining for one day?" (i talk, i never complain!)
"cha gi ya, i really cant take it anymore! can you just let me go and sleep?"
"it's bloody 12am and everyone is all asleep!" (really mea?)
"my school is different from yours." (looking down on me)
"you are so not understanding." (you dont know only, bitch)
and many more.
damn pain eh, my glassy, tiny heart.
every night before i crush, i will think back to myself if i'm really so lousy.
you, obviously find me a windbag already. how to continue?
i dont know how to.
my pride is literally crushed into the soil.
i think i should just be brave and let him off uh?
than he'll be free from 'complaints', nags, and having to forcefully call and talk for that only while, our only period of communication.
yea, i should do that!
time will heal lah!
